Game of Thrones: Season 5, Episode 3: High Sparrow
We’re officially picking up the pace a little. I hadn’t realized until this episode that this show has severely toned down the sex. Season two was almost softcore porn and I actually remember hearing people getting frustrated. It went from that to starting this episode with a wedding and offscreen, audio only sex. I image it’s mainly because Tommen is a child outside of the TV world, but that’s still interesting. Margaery continues to manipulate him and was even brilliant enough to not only get him to ask his mother to leave King’s Landing, but to put subtly put Cersei in her place when she tried to subtly show her disapproval.
As I’ve said before, I just love seeing Cersei lose and she’s losing more and more every episode. Unfortunately, she also had a bit of a victory against the High Septon, who was getting his nasty on. What kind of perv wants prostitutes dressed as gods? That’s like going into a brothel and asking for a prostitute dressed and Jesus or the Virgin Mary… pretty much any character from the bible. It’s just perverted and weird. The sparrows punished his nasty a** and Cersei immediately took advantage of the situation by imprisoning the High Septon (A.K.A. Mr. Gross Pants the godf*cker) and forging an alliance with the “High Sparrow.”
We finally get to see what Little Finger’s plan is. He’s made a bargain with Roose Bolton to marry Sansa (my least favorite Stark) to his psychopathic, video game villain son Ramsay (he’s really the villain of the Telltale Games series). Little Finger dangles the carrot of ruling Winterfell in front of Sansa to get her to comply, which seems to be the go to move these days. She reluctantly agrees, trusting the least trustworthy man in Westeros, and the go on to her old and new home.
Fortunately, the now much more illuminated Podrick and Brienne know where they’re going. Hopefully Brienne will be performing a rescue, possibly with the help of Reek/Theon. There’s a character that could use a bit of redemption, or at least an honorable death. I loved the explanation of how these two fiercely loyal characters came to be under the care of their respective lords. Now we understand their motivations and we have the possibility of Podrick becoming more useful as a fighter under Brienne, who is possibly one of the greatest.
There isn’t too much to say about Arya, except that she is probably still the most interesting character on the show. Not saying that she’s the best character, or even my favorite, but I feel the most invested in her progress. She’s not in any particular danger or anything, but her journey to become a killer is extremely intriguing. She finally understands that she has to abandon who she is in order to become who she wants to be. Of course, being Arya, she breaks the rules to the best of her ability, but it seems she will be a faceless man very soon. Also Jaqen H’ghar is awesome. How the hell did they catch him when she first met him?
Jon Snow, ever the noble fool, more fully refuses Stannis Baratheon’s offer since he is now the Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch. The interactions of the two were great, since they are two characters who are similar in principles. I got a similar feeling of “that’s pretty cool” when Bron and the Hound spoke a couple of seasons back. They’re pairing characters whose conversations make sense. That’s just good writing.
Jon did show a large degree of wisdom in bringing one enemy closer and putting the other in a position he couldn’t win. Ser Janos Slynt was obviously the most useless member of the Watch. Something that was revealed during the battle against the Wildlings. His choices were thinly disguised banishment or death. He unwittingly chose the latter. The new Lord Commander got the cowardly idiot to condemn himself. It was a good move, but I’m not sure how it’ll turn out. Ser Alliser isn’t unreasonable, but it’s clear how much his supporters might be. The Night’s Watch is an army of criminals and bastards after all.
Varys has finally given Tyrion some freedom. He was losing the option of choice, due to Tyrion’s restlessness, so he gave in. Of course he was immediately recognized as soon as he entered a brothel. Interestingly enough, while he showed that he is no longer the same man internally by not having sex with a prostitute, he is fooling no one. He missed the old days, but he finally realizes that’s not who he is anymore. Unfortunately, the revelation came too late and now he has been captured by Jorah Mormont. I’m pretty sure we already know which queen he will be taken too though.
Jonathan Thomas Jones is a speculative fiction author and founder of geekhavenreviews.com. He has been passionate about all things geek for his entire life. See more about him at jonathanthomasjones.com and follow him on twitter @jtgloryjones.
